Twilight Review

I have a confession: I love Twilight. I love it like a fat person loves being used in comparative similes.

Cake
Also, cake. Fat people love cake.

Everything about the series is wonderful. The books are written with the kind of flowing prose that Shakespeare could only dream about. The twists and turns in the books are so enthralling, you’ll be asking “Harry Potter who?”

Hedwig
As opposed to “Harry Potter, hoo!” Heh heh… Owl joke

I’m not usually much for romance stories, but the one in Twilight is just top notch. The tension in the love triangle feels so realistic. Whether you are Team Edward or Team Jacob, you feel you really have a stake in the game. (Stake! Get it? Cuz they’re vampires)

Team Jacob
Team Jacob forever!

The movies are even better than the books! The acting is great, but the best part is the special effects. Especially when the vampires step out into the sunlight. You’ll never see anything more beautiful.

Edward Sparkle
Pictured: Something totally not gay

Final verdict: OMG, TWILIGHT IS THE BESTORZZ!!11

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4 Responses to Twilight Review

  1. Melissa says:

    I knew Twilight was your fave :P

  2. hiro says:

    This is a joke right?

  3. Cody says:

    Ahahahaahahaha. “Something totally not gay”.

    Ahahahahaha.