Black Licorice Review

It turns out that black licorice is known around the world as… licorice. That’s because “black” licorice is made from licorice root while red licorice (or any other crazy color) is not. The name black licorice is redundant. Just like phrases such as: Free gift, foreign import, advance warning, and douchebags from New Jersey.

Jersey Shore
How redundant

I have another name for “Black” licorice: SHIT. This stuff is terrible. It’s like a cruel joke played on your taste buds. After taking a bite of licorice, I seriously contemplate tearing my tongue out of my mouth. (It’d probably be a better choice to just eat something else to cover the taste. But what do I know? I’m not a doctor)

I can’t even describe the taste very accurately. The closest I’ve come is in saying that black licorice tastes like evil. I’m half convinced that it was invented by a carrot farmer to convince kids to give up candy. If someone tried to give me black licorice as a gift, I’d kick them in the spine.

Back kick
“This is what I think of your generosity!”

Along these lines: Good & Plenty is BULLSHIT. Especially because, as a kid, I’d always mistake it for the delicious Good & Fruity (which is made of red licorice instead of black). Let me tell you this, Good & Plenty. You may be plenty, but you are not good. Also, you taste like poop.

Final verdict: I have tasted evil, and its name is black licorice.

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