Arby’s Sauce Review

I like Arby’s. There’s something about getting a pound of roast beef in your sandwich that just feels right (or gluttonous. Same thing). But eating an Arby’s sandwich plain is completely unenjoyable. It’s too dry, and I hate to say it, but it tastes like too much beef.

Cow
“Shut your mouth, fool”

But one simple addition turns an Arby’s roast beef sandwich from a heart attack on a bun into a delicious masterpiece (that’ll still probably cause a heart attack). That would be: Arby’s Sauce.

Arby's Sauce
“Are you surprised? It’s the title of the fricking review. Learn to read.”

Arby’s Sauce is amazing. It’s like ketchup (which I love) but even better. Picture your favorite thing ever. Now try to imagine it if it was even better. That’s what Arby’s Sauce is. It is the main reason I would ever go to Arby’s (Hell… the curly fries are good too, but even those are made better with Arby’s Sauce). It’s tasty and awesome and I love it.

Final verdict: Arby’s Sauce is great. Maybe the best non-salsa condiment out there (although chutney might give it a run for its money). Horsey Sauce, on the other hand, can go eat a dick. That stuff sucks.

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8 Responses to Arby’s Sauce Review

  1. Krystal says:

    Horsey Sauce is amazing. AMAZING. The red Arby’s sauce you speak of is just musty, watered down ketchup. You’ve obviously lost your sense of taste. Perhaps it’s time to seek medical attention?

  2. Melissa says:

    I don’t know…just the name “horsey sauce” (not to mention its color and consistency) seems a little questionable…

  3. Krystal says:

    I can’t argue with that. It’s true.

    • Dan says:

      Sorry Krystal. We all know that Horsey Sauce is short for Horse Semen Sauce. But hey, if that’s what you’re into, far be it for me to judge.

  4. Donald Davenport says:

    Now just wait a minute!! Horsey sauce can go eat a dick?! I’ll have you know that I live for Horsey Sauce. To me it is a thousand violins throbbing in my ear, it is the epitome of taste, it brings my day to its apogee.

    And by the way, how is everything?

  5. angerisforlosers says:

    i could definitely drink a cup of arby’s sauce with every meal…..its the best