Marmaduke (6/18/2011) Review

Marmaduke 6 18 2011

Alternate captions:

1. “Holy shit! That kid slid into another kid so hard he exploded into dust and bones!”

2. And so it was that the town’s little league team uncovered the mass grave of Marmaduke’s victims

3. And that kid was out by a mile. Also, bones.

Seriously, what the hell Marmaduke? I know that Marmaduke is famous for burying bones (where he gets those bones is a question for another day. And the courts.) But, EVEN if he buries them at the local baseball diamond, would he really bury them so shallow that the simple act of sliding into third would send them flying into the air? I mean, look at Marm! He’s easily twice the size of his owner! A single swipe of his massive paw would dig a hole halfway to China. Also, since Marmaduke is some sort of Hell-hound, I don’t think he even needs to dig. He could simply will open a rift into the flames of the Netherworld and toss the bones in their.

I can’t quite make out the expression on Marmaduke’s face. He’s either shocked that his secret burial grounds have been discovered, or he’s one second away from launching into a killing frenzy, sparked by his insatiable blood / bone-lust. The mere sight of a dozen bones is enough to let loose a Hell on earth, spawned from the jaws of this humongous devil beast.

Final verdict: Hehe, Marmaduke is wearing a hat! That’s pretty funny!

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