Buddy’s Pizza Review

Pizza might just be the world’s most perfect food. You can eat it hot or cold, with any combination of toppings imaginable. If someone doesn’t like pizza, it’s only because they weren’t creative enough to pick the right mix of toppings.

Chuck E Cheese
It doesn’t exactly take a genius

I’ve had pizza all over the country, but square pan pizza is a distinctly Detroit pizza. You really can’t find square pizza anywhere else, and when you do, it’s disappointing. Like, going to prom with your cousin disappointing. Like, socks for Christmas disappointing. Like, the following pun disappointing:

Square pizza
“Square” pizza. Get it?

The best square pizza is in Detroit, and the best pizza in Detroit is Buddy’s Pizza. Everything about this pizza is amazing. The cheese is great, the sauce is briliant, but the true highlight is the crust. Buddy’s Pizza crust is perfect. I would marry that crust if it wasn’t illegal in 49 states (and I don’t want to move to Arkansas) Truly, Buddy’s Pizza is the best square pizza in the world.

The best complement to the amazing pizza is Buddy’s antipasto salad. I love antipasto salad because it takes something lame like salad and fills it with meat and cheese. (Take that, health!) I recommend keeping the salad bowl on hand when the pizza is served, as the dressing makes some incredible dippin’ sauce.

It’s not all sunshine and pizza fetishes though. For some reason, the restaurant regularly has clowns visiting to “entertain” the guests. What the hell restaurant? No one likes clowns. Clowns don’t like clowns. Nice try Buddy’s, but I didn’t order my pizza with a side of terror.

Final verdict: Amazing pizza served with pants-wetting fear

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3 Responses to Buddy’s Pizza Review

  1. Krystal Parker says:

    They also have a gluten free pizza that is so delicious I almost ate the box it came in. I recommend Dolly’s Pizza as well. They offer a flavored crust on their square pizzas and have a strict no-clown policy. Clownless flavored crust square pizza…lethal combination, I know.

    • Dan says:

      More establishments should have a strict and posted no-clown policy. If we can get smoking banned inside public places, we should be able to get clowns banned as well.

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